First of all, What makes a family, really a “family”? This subject is so hard for many its almost like walking around on egg shells.
When I was younger I was definitely blessed to have a “normal” type of family, as though I thought. Yes, I had parents who were together, two older siblings who always picked on me, and always spent time with my cousins throughout the year. I thought that was the average kind of childhood.
Once I got went into public school I met my current best friends with COMPLETELY different stories from one another, and I had a tiny bit of a new prospective.
Later on in years after tragic events within the family that almost separated us around the time I was in Middle School it was weird and hard for me. Being so young and not knowing why it almost felt like no one was talking, MAYBE once a year. Let me tell you, we all live within in 40mi of each other, so its not an excuse for living far away. I never knew why this was happening but once high school started, all the cousins were growing up and I started questioning everyones actions and how we all treated each other.
I realized all these tragic events in our lives and drama behind those problems have never been resolved between ANYONE.
Now you are probably thinking, “Well what’s so bad about that? You still have them? You get to spend time with them!” Let me tell you, I am so grateful for my family, but there are deeper wounds that need more than a band aid for any of us to be real or communicate and each family member shows different signs of it, whether its drinking too much, talking shit on every person with every other person, only choosing specific conversations that only please yourself, or my “go to” just don’t show up. Because in my eyes it’s better to save the migraine I get with these people than to put on a fake ass smile.
Now, I didn’t say all of this to brag or talk shit, I said it to bring of the fact, family is who you make it. Who you invest your time not only because of holidays or big events, but because you thrive to see the others? I have been growing my “family” for the past 10 years and I couldn’t be happier.
Of course, I am still thankful for my blood family and would anything for them, but I don’t let my hopes get up and invest into something that has let me down most my life. I share this because, we all come from different backgrounds BUT on some level we can all relate in a pinch of a way to each story of a person and help each other grow from events in the past.
I would not take back anything I’ve been through in my childhood, it has made me the person I am today, able to overlook situations I am in and really think about who or what I’m talking about or act before I speak. I also wouldn’t take it back for the family I now have today. JStay tuned for my next post leading to my journey talking about friends, who essentially are my family!
If you or anyone you know needs to share or just simply rant, I would love to hear what you have to say or been through. Go ahead and contact me through “Contact info” in my list up below! Or Send me a DM @Jilliannklatt on Instagram.
Thank you so much if you have made it this far!